a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Ketchup is God's man juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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