good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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