i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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