why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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