cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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