Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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