Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
