i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
