Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize
