my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize