Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
