Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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