You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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