Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Boobs are out for the taking
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.