i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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