I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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