I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
