Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize