i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I puked off the balcony.
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD