come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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