You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
