If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
