Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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