is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
