Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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