I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
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Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
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It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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