Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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