I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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