Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
