Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
