But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
