she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
