I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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