Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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