Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Man, jail baloney is awful.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
