ADVERTISEMENT

• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  but the lizard people decide everything anyway

  Fav 27 4110 1023

  share tweet
  

• (480): View more from Arizona

  you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.

  Fav 20 4858 872

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (765): View more from Indiana

  I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.

  Fav 4 3415 928

  share tweet
  

• (989): View more from Michigan

  Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.

  Fav 2 2113 809

  share tweet
  
• 

  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.

  Fav 2 1723 764

  share tweet
  

• (719): View more from Colorado

  If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message

  Fav 1 1538 643

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (209): View more from California

  Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel

  Fav 15 1534 643

  share tweet
  

• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.

  (1-617): View more from Massachusetts

  Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.

  Fav 8 2085 689

  share tweet
  

• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.

  (1-814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Exactly how many...is TOO many?

  Fav 7 1139 622

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (206): View more from Washington

  you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...

  Fav 3 882 560

  share tweet
  

• (517): View more from Michigan

  My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....

  Fav 2 1097 371

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (563): View more from Iowa

  I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.

  Fav 1 478 279

  share tweet
  

• (913): View more from Kansas

  Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am

  Fav 0 198 110

  share tweet
  

• (941): View more from Florida

  Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night

  Fav 2 63 18

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (559): View more from California

  I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.

  (925): View more from California

  Huzzah!

  Fav 1 52 8

  share tweet
  

Randomize