Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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