He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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