can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Randomize