margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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