don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
