My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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