she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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