hotel room ftw
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Randomize
