What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
