on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
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Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
We don't watch enough power rangers
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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