you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
