We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Randomize
