Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
