he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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