There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
