When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
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