sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
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